The Virgin wife

                                             By                                                                 Anonymous.             

"She is still a virgin, her hymen is still fully intact” my colleague reported

Impossible!” I replied 

“From her family history I took, she said she has been married for four years”

I received the rude shock of my life that fateful day.

So I had just started work recently in the Federal Medical Centre when this couple waltzed into my office, with the husband wearing an expression like a lamb who was being led to the slaughter.

The couple were sexually active but after 4 years without a child, they decided to visit the hospital.

I listened to them and looked at the form they had and after giving them counseling, I proceeded to give him directions. You See, from my training, in every case of infertility, the man is my first suspect because, from statistics, males and females contribute 50% each to cases of infertility, but seeing as its easier to ascertain the fertility status of the man, it's best to start from him.

“You will abstain from your wife for five days after which you will come to the hospital and you will give us your semen by masturbation”

"Holy Ghost fire! Jesus! I bind you! I’m a born-again Christian I would do no such thing!” he roared. 

Well, we found a way around getting him to produce the sample. And upon examination, it was of such a high quality that it could produce triplets at the first shot. So next is to examine his wife. 

I called on my female colleague to collect her endocervical swab for the analysis and boom! She is still a virgin after four years of marriage. Well, while this couple had a pretty strange case (I used to think that finding the pleasure spot was an innate ability like a newborn baby locating the nipple for breastmilk) but on further examination, it turned out both couples were born in a church where the mention of the normal human parts is a taboo not to talk about mentioning the word ‘Sex’.

There are many reasons for the observed current high rate of infertility. Ranging from,

- Hormonal imbalances arising from the kinds of food we eat (excessive consumption of processed food has been linked with higher infertility).

-For some couples, the females have developed immune responses against the sperm cells of their husbands. A kind of antagonism. Meaning she may have to find another husband if she must become pregnant. Weird things we see every day. 

-For others, vaginal secretions have been designed to kill all sperm cells. 

However, there are other factors that are not biological that we should focus on. How frequently do you cuddle up and ‘fight the good fight?'

 

Another case that is also rather weird but prevalent is that some women ovulate during the days of their menstrual flow. Meaning for pregnancy to occur, the couple has to meet during her menses. Ouch! It's even against the Mosaic laws! – well, it is what it is. 

For our couple, we had to take them through a proper lecture on how to make love and teach the difference between normal and anal sexual intercourse. – the things we have to deal with right? So maybe it’s really not a biological issue. 

Finally, The anatomical makeup of some women is such that their bodies cannot carry a pregnancy and this is why there are centers for in-vitro fertilization and surrogate mothers.

Don't be quick to tag yourself infertile or barren but do well to visit your doctor today for a thorough examination and professional advice.