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Showing posts from June, 2022

While you still can.

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'Ashes to ashes   Dust to dust' For the uptenth time, Wendy prayed it wasn't real as she stood watching them cover the coffin, each shovel of sand taking her farther away forever from her bestie. Wendy and Tess instantly became friends the first day they met in Nursery school. Tess was always the forward one, the life of the party, mother hen High school, college and even beyond they became inseparable. Then a little misunderstanding.... Like two love birds circling each other, they began the hide and seek game at reconciliation. Tess suddenly took ill Wendy thought it was business as usual.  How was she to know that seeing her bestie wheeled into the theatre would be the last time she'd be seeing her alive? Hubby and i have a policy of resolving whatever our grievances are as immediately as possible. The two or three days you spend in anger is lost forever. Why loose time vexing, when every moment can be spent loving? Say those words Do those things you can

What next?

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After you've done all you can, What's next? You've read so thoroughly, worked so hard, put in all of your best into those projects and yet... Then that breaking point of helplessness When everything seems to be falling apart You withdraw to your shell and put on the cloak of thinking Yet, nothing changes Cos worry steals your joy and leaves you with nothing but fear When it seems like it's over  When you feel overwhelmed, dejected or lost PRAY!

You can only do so much; Rest!

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Let's eat and drink for tomorrow we die' says a powerful proverb. Monday you do calls Tuesday you're unhappy you were blackmailed to stay at homeful so you're everywhere with your laptop Wednesday, online conferences Thurs, friday, saturday, sunday,.there's something listened to the house. You're asleep? How dare you sit at a spot when you have an endliess list.of things to do? Sound mind & good health are fundamental and they help make one realise whats more important that life. Take out time to rest, pamper your body, detoxify from any negative news. Eat, drink, exercise, laugh, swim, travel. The world won't end Nobody will die if you give yourself a little break. Rest, re-energize, fire on. No matter what you do, think of your health first. Health is wealth.

This too shall pass

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Bleak sky, distress, confusion, pain This too shall pass Shame, disappointment, travails This too shall pass There's no challenge too tough No pain too deep No obstacle too strong to be moved This too shall pass In the middle of the storm, it might seem there'd  be no breakthrough Remember the night is at it's darknest just before daylight This too shall pass Even when you don't know all the solutions This too shall pass Even when the best of your efforts come to naught This too shall pass and you'll finally realize that there's definitely s better tomorrow.

Frenemies.

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`Babe, it's because of you oh. Normally, I'd be selling for#800 but take it for #150'. That was a former neighbour speaking. `You're like family to me so just take it for#500' The enemy within is the worst of it's kind. They are the ones who pretend to care, The ones who actually when their identities  are revealed leaves one speechless. Most times when one has problems, people try to find their way around so as to take advantage of the people or situation. The worst kind of betrayal is from those we call family, those who should cover us but are busy exposing us. They hit where it hurts; friendly enemies. So no matter how many times or how well you think you know people, if they move from  your life, celebrate their departure; you never can tell what God is saving you from.

Who send me ooooohhhhhhhh?

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And that's how i found myself on the bed while my roomie Gwen was trying to force milk and malt into my mouth. Few hours prior to this time i had just finished washing my hair and since the next day was Sunday, i was contemplating what I'd do with my hair when Gwen suggested we go to her hairstylist to braid. In her words 'The stylist braid na final. Na she dey always give me this my baby girl looks'. I opted for a simple all back Ghana weaving just to avoid stress (If only i had an inclination of what the future held for me). The minute the stylist began braiding, i was already begging her to loosen her grip but she insisted she was braiding that way so the hair would look neat and last longer. By the third braid, my eyelids were already touching my forehead. By the completion of the hair, i had become dumb due to pain. Two hours later i was standing at the precipice of insanity. My head was on fire and i could hear the host of heaven singing the 'Halle

Things must be done according to the letters of the law

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Life is not really such a straight jacket thing, you never know what would come knocking. Exceptions should be made in our thinking and behaviour to make considerations for mistakes, to show our humane side. Some times, things aren't just outlined in black and white, there are also gray arears. This is where the application of wisdom,tolerance, patience and more comed in. Remember we are all wired differently? Nobody is born perfect, nobody is born dull. We must therefore make consertion and be more open minded to people.

If wishes were horses...

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I wish... I wish... I wish... If wishes were horses beggars would ride. If life functioned by wishing, we'd all have 6 packs, hour glass shapes, billions in the bank, thousands at our service and all the finery life had to offer. We can't become successful in life by wishing upon what we want. Success requires work, success requires diligence, consistency, risks and more. Life cannot give us beyond what we have worked for We are the pilots of our destiny If we pursue greatness, we'd have it If we decide to just go with the flow then we should be ready to accept anything. Remember, successs doesn't just happen by wishing.

99 days for the ....,one day for the owner

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Once again, i made my peppered goat meat. Looked fabulous and tasted heavenly and delicious. By the next morning most of it was gone! Ahhhhhhhhr this finally confirmed my thinking that my meat was always coming up short.  Well, the answer was simple, 'Find the cause and nail the the true culprit'. So i went into my grand masterplan. Made peppered meat again and off we went to bed Gbaaaammm, gbaaaammmm grrrr the lid of the pot crashed on the floors while my wonderful husband fr oze in place. I should've know given how much he loved goat meat. To think at first i carried him along in my plans. Well, the goat meat Angel was caught and to serve as his way of restituiting, he was made to buy more meat and to be watching over the meat whenever it was made.

And so?

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There's really no manual for parenting, we simply do what we perceive as the best for our children, though we have several materials that might provide some form of guide. Went visiting a family today and in the middle of our talks, their 2yrs old daughter ran out to her Dad singing and talking. It appeared like he was ashamed  and scolded her to go back to her room. Why? And he said 'Look at her, isn't she too small for her age? Indeed, the child looked somewhat smaller but i couldn't understand his treatment so i asked him 'Is there an award for the fastest growing child?' Do not put pressure on yourself and your healthy child when they don't reach some milestones at some age people perceive they should. Children teeth, crawl, walk, run and more in their own time What's most important is that your children are healthy and loved.

Action speaks louder

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Action they say speaks louder than words. That a person resolves to do a thing, has his goals written down is a nice step towards achieving success but the greatest ingredient of all is backing up your written down goals into action.  No matter how beautiful the goals might be without corresponding action, it's just mere words without life. The target is to put the words into action. It doesn't have to necessarily be giant steps but no matter how small it is, take that step. Begin to bring those words into action even if you have to start with s phone call, a proposal, a design.... On the long term people are more susceptible to render help, partner with or fund a person who they see doing something than a person whose dreams are all paper talks. So go out today and begin to put your goals to life.

A letter to Uchenna my sugar zaddy

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Today's been long overdue,  After celebrating women countlessly under several tags, the world finally decides to honour the men with one day. Sweet zaddy, You've shown me immeasurable love Peace without bounds Support without asking for anything in return Comfort, kindness, patience King of my heart Prince of my world Father figure You continuously go out of your way to satisfy my every craving. Your sacifices are numerous to be numbered Too weighty to be quantified You're that fountain that gives and keeps  on giving A selfless husband An exemplary father. Today i celebrate you my greatest Love For all that you are and all that you represent Today i celebrate a friend who shows up anytime i call Who knows what my heart longs for even before the words are said I celebrate you my soulmate. To my loving father who instructed me,  Who watchfully and intentionally guided my path to the woman i've become Who loved his children unconditionally You're a wonderf

They're watching!

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'Hey, hey pick that' ...before i was done with the statement my daughter began picking up and arranging stuffs around the house the way i do. My son woke up started crying as i dragged him to the bathroom. While bathing his sister, after i was done  with him, he ran to the bed, started tugging at the bedspread. Ohhhhh, he was crying to lay the bed, which was our daily routine . Whenever we woke up we'd arranged the bed, pray and shower. We woke up late today and decided to skip the routine but my son wasn't having it. Children are a complete mirror of whatever we do. No matter how loud you scream, you're sure to get better results by leading them by example. We set the standard for what our kids do and what they find acceptable. We may think the things we do are insignificant and therefore go unnoticed but we'd be shocked when our kids will begin to follow in our footsteps therefore we've got to be deliberate about all we do around our kids. The

Duchee & Gabana

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Why are people jealous like this? Why can't people just mind their business? Any small peace and joy you get they'd be looking for ways to puncture it. It's not like i'm not a big girl oh It's just that i don't like showing off you get? Well, sometime one Christmas in my high school days, it seemed everyone had a designer item in their wardrobe the term that just preceeded the Christmas holiday. Unnecessary tension everywhere Designer bag, designer shirt, designer shoe, designer this and that I decided to take my eyes off these wordly things and focus on my God and besides why spend money on trivial things when you should be chasing destiny, helping the poor and stuffs like that. Well, well my people, 22nd December, yours truly and my family landed in the East and guess what?  I saw them designer everything flying everywhere My God! The tension followed me to the village? A whole me Abuja Babe had no designer label but young boys and girls in the vil

Never say never until it's done

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It takes alot of courage to keep at a thing with little or no results no matter how much positive or good what you're doing is. At the beginning of embarking on any goal, there's usually an exceptional amount of motivation, inspiration and all of such that we might even unconsciously spread the fever of passion to those around us. This post however is about those times when it feels like you're burnt out but you've got to keep going, When those around have already heard you talk about your goals so much so that they're no longer enthusiastic when they hear you, When results don't begin to show as at when you expected it to but you've got to keep working and keep believing. Times when everything goes cold and you've got to encourage and inspire yourself. Remember the famous Thomas Edison and his attempts at making the bulb light? Of course he finally got it, but imagine what his friends would've said at the 604th attempt?  How other scient

Jealousy, the root of hatred

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Ever met people who are envious and praying for your downfall for no reason at all? So hubby and i were returning home and  got to the police check point before our house. The cars on the opposite side were given the signal to go so our lane had to stop. A big truck was trying to navigate it's way and everyone was maki ng room for it to pass. In front of us was a tricycle, hubby horned severally for him to go forward so we'd move as well out of the truck's way given that he had space in front of him. The man adamantly refused, so hubby came down to talk to him. Guess his response? 'Oga no disturb me oh, no be me say make you buy big car' he said and stayed put until the truck got to where we were and couldn't move, causing traffic. The police almost beat him up before he moved to give us room. Ever met motorcyclist who'd drag and almost if not actually hit you. The minute you come down to complain, the next thing you'd hear is 'blood mone

Attitude Vs Principles

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Bad attitude has been hidden under the guise of being principled for so long. I had a literal experience of the adage ' A bad attitude is like a flat tyre, you can't go anywhere with it' Hubby and i woke up monday morning to find our front tyre had gone completely flat and we had an appointment to meet up. We decided to try rolling the car to the nearest junction but the screeching sounds won't even let us leave our house. Hubby had to loose the tyre and fix a spare before we could leave home. A person with principle will  not resort to insults or act out or be adamant when other views outside of his is presented. So many people have lost out on jobs, and life transforming opportunities due to bad attitude. Talking down and being rude to people in the name of 'I can't take rubbish or allow anyone look down on me' Putting up bad behaviour and claiming 'Anyone who can't accept me the way i am, has lost'   Having the right attitude is th

Hunger games; why me?

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Please can someone explain the science behind this? After billing my maga, he bought everything in the list and more Baby girl was set for the night I didn't even have anything as anticipation for what was to come was so hiiiigggghhhh So i'm sitting with my phone wondering how to go through this night It sure's gonna be a long night and i'm wondering why these village people chose to strike a good girl like me Boo came home while i was taking a nap so he chose to let me enjoy my sleep Decided to do some loving up as per gratitude before i headed to the kitchen. He bought everything I'd need to make my favourite meal and a bottle of wine chilling. Washed and seasoned the chicken  Taap taaap, no response Taap, taaap, nothing I turned the knob for the third time, nothing That's how gas finished oh this night without warning. Please who can explain the science behind gas finishing at night or at times when you can't do anything about it? Bent over my

Come Home.

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Home; A safe haven, a place where one finds peace, warmth, love, where you can be naked without being judged, a place of refuge, a place you're cherished. Everybody needs this in their life, where they can confidently walk into inspite of everything and anything Where you can go to when things are bad or life's giving it back tough A place where your mistakes are not hung over you. Nobody is immune to such kind of feeling No one would find such and choose the alternative of a life full of chaos Everyone seeks to find this home Sometimes it might be in the kind of family one builds, this is the classical example of why many spouses who have such in their lives never stay far from each other and are therefore bonded Sometimes we find our homes in an individual we can always run to in good or bad time from spouses, to friends and more. The absence of this is the reason why many kids go beserk and finally lost to societal ills Or spouses are reluctant to go home, the me

Children !children!!

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I was sweeping the sitting room for the 7th time and it was only mid-day By the time i tucked the kids into bed for the night, i felt the exhaustion in my bones, as though i had an encounter with Hulk Hogan. Kids are such a beautiful part of our lives. For anyone who's not yet ready to have them, time spent in their company is enough to restore your factory setting yet without them, our world would be incomplete. Today was mapped out to be spent resting  and relaxing but i barely sat down as i kept going in circles, from one chore to the other, picking and cleaning them and after them. By the time nightfall came, i was more than ready to welcome it. I remember insisting on having two kids when hubby wanted just one. I got my desire granted as well as.the accompanying endless chore. These kids have given me crazy experiences from bathing themselves with tins of their milk to pouring detergents in freshly made meals or smashing to death over three of my phone so far. Thei

Someone tell me why?

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Somethings have a way of testing you and every principle you believe in. The same applies to the behaviour of some persons, especially when adults exhibit such characters. You begin to wonder if these persons don't have self control, or the childhood lessons from their parents have suddenly been thrown out the window. This is exactly what got the Biblical Esau in trouble in the first place. I mean, how can an adult, a matured adult... I had a similar experience yesterday and as I'm walking down my street, I'm looking out to be sure there's no familiar face around. What sort of thing is this, that even persons you hold in high esteem seem to forget themselves and also fall prey to it? I think an in-depth research ought  to be conducted as regards this issue because it seems like there's a spirit behind this thing that makes everybody loose guard. After having a long day, you decide to give yourself a little inexpensive treat just to help you relax as you

Heaven helps those who helps themselves.

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The white Range Rover sped past and splashed dirty water from the potholes. Immediately the brake light came on a young man alighted, impeccably dressed in designer suit.  'I'm so sorry, my driver didn't notice the potholes on time' he said as he walked to a thoroughly drenched Tunde. The frustration was so evident on Tunde's face haven been turned down again from the job interview he went for and to think what he had on was his best corporate wear. He was thinking of where his next meal would come from as he was walking to the bus stop when the car sped his way. Sensing the control in Tumde's emotions, the man offered to pay for a new wear. 'Jay, Action Jay is that you?' Screamed Tunde A befuddled Jayden starred at the man in front of him until recognition hit him and he called out 'Tunde God's favourite' is that you? What a pleasant reunion it was as both men sat in the Lounge of one of Jayden's hotel reminiscing. Tunde was

Love & compatibility

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Dolly Parton is worth about $350 million while her hubby is roughly worth $20 million yet they've been living and loving each other forever, no tabloids or media rants. Who are you in love with? Are you certain your intended can stand your success or stand to clap while the spotlight shines on you? I've heard several men say 'I can never allow my wife to work'. Or 'I can't be with a woman that is more financially empowered than i am'. Or 'My wife cannot have money oh, how will i control her if she does? If she has money now she'd start rubbing shoulders with me' I've also met women who for whatever selfish reasons from attention to time or greed, they frustrate and try to discourage everything their man does to improve himself. ' If he gets that job i know he'd leave me' Or 'Women will start chasing him around once that contract comes, so i don't want him to get it' Are you with a partner who encourages and

Can we talk?

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Must everything end with a fight? Just because a person doesn't agree with your beliefs, opinions or position over a thing does not license you to cut the other person down with your words or actions. We are all entitled to our opinions. The fact that we have different views is what brings colour to the table. It also affords the opportunity for learning, to understand the views of others, to expand what we know, to even unlearn or be better informed. Having an open mindset about things is a very necessary ingredient for growth. Today a gospel artist asked people to make a certain post at a certain time. Of course due to his influence the posts spread like wildfire. Several persons came online to bash and mock the artist. You see or hear of something a person said or did you don't agree with, either you ignore, try to understand the other person's perspective or submit your views or corrections in love or objectively. One must not resort to becoming abusive or h

Why you dey Bugga?

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2015 , hubby, my then boyfriend, called to give me the goodnews of a close friend who just bought a car. We hung out that evening, celebrated with him and parted ways. Of course it was a joyful moment being the first amongst friends to own a car but as the days went by, 'Oga car owner' began giving off funny attitudes. Soon enough, he began keeping everyone at arm's length. Well, it's 2022 and he's still on that car meanwhile hubby has changed at least three cars. Alot of people behave like this. A little achievement and they begin to look down or mistreat everyone around. They buy a car or build a house and everyone is suddenly beneath them. It was all good until they said 'I do' and suddenly their single friends prior the wedding are no longer good enough or they become bad company and as such are cut off. Do not let yourself be blinded by your achievements such that you begin to despice those who have  been with you or stood by you. In life, t

Where do we go from here?

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As i watched the video of the Owo killings in Osun state, my heart broke for those who died, i wonder how much fear and despair were in their eyes in those last minutes. Again, my heart broke for the many who  lost their loved ones. How much more blood can our land take? How many more lives will be lost before we become challenged to demand for what is right? Over 50 persons dead and the leadership of our nation is yet to address us as people to console the families of the dead or outline how the government plans to handle the  situation. It more or less shows that the government is less concerned about the people's plight and more focused on achieving control of power in the pending primaries. Being a citizen of this country sure feels like a thousand ways to die. No value for human live not to mention properties No sign of urgency in intervening  and arresting the culprits of such a dastard act or protection from further occurrence. Tomorrow primaries continues snd we

Deliberate Parenting

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Like vultures around a carcass, my siblings and i hovered round and round the sitting room until we were certain our Boss was asleep. My immediate younger brother snuck the remote from the side stool like a pro, turned down the volume and within minutes our favourite channel was on and we had all assumed our respective positions for easy escape. Well, the Boss still beat us to it by letting us get comfy then sprang the surprise of opening his eyes before we could make good our escape. He made us all watch the 10pm news with him 😢😭and subsequently would ask us to sit  with him while watching the news with our pen  and paper and we'd read out to him what we gleaned at the end of the news hour. Overtime we all became lovers of watching the news and that also marked the beginning of our reading culture. Secondly, i remember how the first morning devotion upon our return for the holidays (my siblings and i all went to boarding school) was a time for family discussion and b

You say? It's also our turn

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So the ruling party has disqualified 15persons from running for the seat of President That's 100million multiplied by 15..... Well, one very hopeful aspirant has stated that his bid was been manipulated after giving support to the present day leadership. And the most interesting thing of all is that he said he wants to be president because it's his turn. One thing these set of politicians fail to understand is that it's not just about them. Yes, it's your turn to rule  but millions of persons make up Nigeria's population and it's also their turn to get better, to demand better, to also be given a fair chance to even the basic things. Yes, right now, it's the turn of the poor masses Their turn to demand for what they've been deprived, for what is just and right, to no longer settle for just about anything. Yes Oga politician, it's the turn of the people So before you start to cry that woeful tears again, know that it's no longer busine

To supportive partners

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I woke up  with a start. How or better still, when did i fall asleep? I wondered as i remembered i had a whole lot to do. And why was the house so quiet? I stumbled out of bed into the kids room to find hubby sprawled on the bed, cuddled by the kids and all fast asleep. The kids were dressed in their PJ's which meant they had been fed and bathed before they were put to sleep. Can't explain how much warmth i felt at the sight and to know i had a partner who looked out for me. He must've sensed how exhausted i was that when i dozed off, he simply let me be and took care of the kids. Yes, you both are responsible for the kids and the general welfare of the house but we all know this largely falls on the woman. On a general note, having a spouse who provides you support and a million other ways to make life better and easier is a blessing. Using this medium to celebrate those who help their partners be and become. From assisting in chores, to assisting in official p

Mummy duties

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2:15am, i lay on the bed with my eyes closed but my mind was still churning out chore after chore. It had been a long day out. On getting home, one look around and the 'everything has got to be in it's place' me took to instantly arranging, dusting, washing, fixing, mopping up ohhhhhhh let's not forget the kid's laundry, you know the uniform and it's likes had to be washed. Not stretched out enough? Add dinner to all the activities and i was functioning on maximum capacity. A few hours later, i could barely stand yet i had to do battle with the kids. Was speaking with a friend who was ill. Illness however,didn't stop everyone from waiting on her to run the house. This brings me to the discuss for today. Why do women find it hard to rest?  From one chore to the other and before you know it, it's another nightfall. By morning the cycle is repeated again. Truth is that we have to consciously teach our minds to learn that the chores will never en