The Good Life

You see some of these Uncles, evil people that will cannot give somebody something. Just small oh, they cannot and they'll be calling somebody ' Princess, Fine girl' bla bla bla. Oya let me start from the beginning of this my anger. You see Uncle Felix? Everytime he will come to our house and be shouting, calling my name 'Chiiioooommmaaaa, come and buy this one for me, come and buy that one for me'  There's no single day Uncle Felix will not send me. Even that other day that his fiance was coming and he was inside the house with Aunty Amaka it's me that helped Aunty to follow the backyard of our compound. Why am I angry? After going everywhere on so many errands for Uncle Felix, he now told that he'll buy me icecream. You need to see the speed with which I did everything for him today. Only for Uncle Felix to return and he was with one girl. Next thing I know, they sat outside the compound and were licking the icecream🍦 that was supposed to ...

Growing up until now, my Dad has always been my biggest support system, my cheerleader, instructor, guidian and role model. I remember an instance when he was going over my take home assignment with me and picked interest in helping me improve my handwriting as what I had was barely visible. Everyday he'd sit with me while guiding my hands to write. In no time, my writing has tremendously improved that my teachers in school began giving me commendation. Same thing applied with my spoken English as well as general life decisions. The role of father's in the lives of children, cannot be overemphasized.  Fatherless children are  twice as likely to drop out of high school than children with both parents at home  (U.S. Census Bureau, 2021). The fatherless are also 40 percent more likely to repeat a class and 70 percent more likely to drop out of school (Ibid). 15 Feb 2022.  Fathers are the bedrock for growth, development and stability of the children and homes...

The audacity with which some persons act like partners or better still, shareholders in a marriage is laughable. So there I was in the sitting room with our daughter watching a movie when I heard hubby call out 'Baby,Baby'! Before I could get up from the couch, little madam was ahead of me, running to the room. We made it to the room just as hubby was calling out again and responded 'Yes'? Unanimously. Ahhhhhhhhhh it was at this point I understood clearly why the little madam sped off when hubby called at first. Hubby called again in a bid to say something else and yet again, we both responded 'Yes'! Immediately the little madam turned to me and said 'No, I'm Daddy's Baby girl' I didn't know that I was sharing the man I paid full groom price for, with another lady. Right now our daughter has legitimately taken over the name 'Baby'. Kids are something else 🤣🤣🤣 Ever had such experience?

Been a long time since hubby was home due to a research trip.  We were very eager to jump on each other but equally very very very exhausted. We had a stressful day to blame for it.  So we settled for cuddling, catching up on our amebor and the likes. This got me thinking; how do couples who are trying to conceive feel during sex and things around it? First you're dealing with the emotions and most times the desperation of wanting a baby so bad. Then you're all tied up in knots with medications and calculations, to find the right time to make love with your partner. How then do you initiate or find making love enjoyable when your mind is working 24/7 with thoughts of 'Will this time be the one?' I couldn't imagine being in that position of trying to have a baby, staying happy, maintaining your sanity, evading prying eyes and questions, ohhhhh let's not forget some people's insensitive to the plight of others. My heart just bled. I felt a glimpse ...

Our Primary four Aunty always had an excuse for why her daughter scarcely joined us for rehearsals. It was the end of year celebration in our school. The biggest celebration our school held annually, so everyone always took rehearsals and every instructions given very seriously. Which is exactly why we didn't understand Aunty Primary 3 kept making the excuses for her daughter. For the rest of us who always came out for the two hours daily rehearsals after school, it looked like so much suffering, pains and loads of sacrifices. The D-Day finally came and we all filed out looking all smart in our white shirts, khaki shorts, white socks and sneakers. Aunty primary 3 put her daughter right at the front even after she missed 90% of the rehearsals, robbing those of us who practiced our legitimate spot. The presentations started and for almost every step of the moves, Aunty primary 3's daughter flopped disgracefully. Great results/achievements do not come by who you know o...

So I needed referees for something I was applying for. After giving it some thought, I remembered a classmate who could help me and reached out. This is someone who we speak at least once in awhile. So it wasn't strange reaching out. After presenting my case to him, he welcomed me cheerfully, asked what I needed it for. Of course I filled him in on every detail. He promised to help and asked I give him awhile to get back to me as he was working. Till date, I'm still waiting for him to get back to me as that was the last time I heard from him. It's surprising how people behave. Some persons disguise as friends but deep down are unhappy when something good comes to you. Where they can render help, they pretend they can't or dodge away from doing so. An Aunt once refered my hubby to a church for prayers, instead of simply introducing him to one of her friends whom he needed a letter of introduction from. Somehow, I was blessed to get what I was pursuing without...

There's been so much emphasis on mental health yet alot of people still ignore it for reasons best known to them. Ever been in a work environment that was suffocating or better still, toxic? Read a Banker lady's story, where her Boss was a mighty definition of everything toxic. Been heavily pregnant and due any minute, her Boss kept her working full time up until she went into labour. She went straight to the hospital from the office and birthed her baby. She missed work the following day of course with genuine reasons but her Boss issued her a query for her absence as she didn't give a formal notice. How about the Boss whose every word was criticism, harassment and more of it's kind. There was nothing his staffs did that ever was right. A friend of mine worked under such and came home every other day with a hurting story or in tears. Why subject yourself to such continuous torture?  Ohhhhhhh, there's no job in Nigeria you know, This is my only source of...

On Nigeria's New Currency Nigerians were greeted with the announcement that some currencies, specifically,  200, 500 and 1000 Naira notes had been redesigned and that these new currencies will be introduced on 15th December, while the current currencies will be phased out until 31st January,  2023. Well, the notes had finally be unveiled on Wednesday,  23rd April and the appearance leaves much to be desired at the surface level. With many people having the opinion that it was a mere colour change. Whilst the rage continues, one can only wonder how a country,  as big as Nigeria, dubbed the most populous black nation in the world, with a population estimated to be over 200million, somehow there was no way to harness the true potentials of the country to get a better design beyond the apparent change in colour. While it is argued, from the government representatives that the reason for the observed slight changes were to cut costs. I had to read more and it'...

Yeah, it was indeed a very long day, and yes, bad. From one crisis to the other. It seemed all I did today was put out fires from point A-Z.  By the time I got home, I was completely exhausted and sought quiet and a refreshing shower and nap. Hellooooooooo the kids and other family responsibilities were waiting to welcome me.😭😭😭. Indeed it was one of those days when my body system shut down the minute I hit the bed. Some days it's like a crazy circus, going round and round.  Filing in so many roles, from office, to the house and in between you've got deadlines. Well, if we aren't careful this kind of day will overwhelm one. But then one MUST take care of himself or herself to be able to function optimally. Take out some hours to yourself and detoxify, take a nap, take a walk... At the end of the day, take a rest.

So I saw this post online and had a great laughter.  Imagine that this kind of law becomes passed in Nigeria. Ahhhhhhhhhh, Nigeria men and their ego! Nigeria men to take permission from their wives? And of all things, permission to go have a good time? Hahaha  You'll just be hearing 'Do you know I'm the man of the house?' flying around everywhere. Well, this law would mean next to nothing in some homes because we do have men in Nigeria who do not only shower love on their wives but have made their homes a peaceful haven. A person who genuinely loves you actually does open up to you all their dealings and doesn't need a law to involve his/her in decision making. This actually has nothing to do with religion, tribe, education and all. A home where love is the foundational ingredients, never goes underground. For a marriage to work, the man needs the woman as much as the woman needs the husband. Both needs each other to thrive. Get your partner involved in ...

The day Comfort came to ask for this loan, it was the last money in my account, but she needed it as a matter of urgency, with the promise to return it in a week time and so I gave it in trust. Four months later and Comfort is yet to return the loan. I naturally do not like bothering people so, whenever I make up my mind to become tough minded and I call her concerning the loan repayment , she'd readily have one story or another why she couldn't pay back at the moment.  One day I call again, only to be screamed at about how she doesn't have the cash and me being a good and understanding person let her be. Till date, she never really did repay me. Many persons do this and it's quite unfortunate that persons would rather destroy relationship of years, lie, pretend ... Do not be an ingrate by your behaviour. Return loans as at when due, Don't make people ever regret helping you. You might be needed the help again.

We literally are in God's hands! Hubby went on a business trip to the East and was scheduled to return today. However, he concluded his business pretty late and as such missed his flight. Next thing I'm on line with hubby and he's telling me how he just paid for a seat in a Sienna. Oh my goodness! I practically fainted and woke up. Road trip! With the stories flying around about kidnapping? Automatically lost my peace and sanity. It was all dark clouds for the rest of the day. I became a non-stop prayer machine. I subsequently won't stop sweating or using the restroom. God, why me? Yes, I had no rest until he got home. This simply beats my mind; so kidnapping is bow the order of the day? So who's running the country? The people or social vices almost here for us to racees

Chi Baby! Princess of Okpaga-Elechi dynasty Crown Princess Blue blooded Royalty inside out The way I landed in hubby's house, he didn't know what hit him.  A whole Chi Baby like me, you know I make statement anywhere I appear. So, while we were still dating hubby would just release a booooo ... At first, I lost peace and all Would complain and he'd ask me what he should do about a gift from God. Well, five years into marriage, everyone is farting as e dey hot! Days ago we were having a very heated argument about hubby's work when boooommmm I released a fart 'Jesus! This is not the girl I married oh. Help!!' Hubby said. Remember when I'd beg you to use the restroom for your farting? Well, now it's harvest time because the Bible instructs we, train up a child the way he should go and when he's old, he won't depart from it.

Every Sunday, this woman would always look for a way to try and harass somebody. Last Sunday it was complains that my kids were too playful in church. The Sunday before she was lecturing me on how to parent the kids and be very firm so as not to spoil them. This Sunday she saw my girl crying and began querying me for keeping her hungry. She drew the agreement without asking questions. People of God, I changed it for Madam parenting encyclopedia oh. Parenting is hard enough. Why add your evil spirit to the load of young parents? You had your own fair share of opportunity to do what you did with your kids and now you want to suffocate the young generation? Madam, thanks but no thanks, go and rest and let people live their lives, make their mistakes and if they seek your advice or opinion, bless God! And by all means, you give it. The same principle applies to every facet of life from marriage to childbirth, to live's decisions. If you're not called on, face your front...

Hubby and I have had come to an agreement before we got married that we wouldn't be staying with helps for a million reasons. The major decider that swayed the pendulum in favour of our decision would be our previous individual experiences with helps from our family home. I've seen crazy things from helps setting our house ablaze, to the ones who starved us, the ones who did the common stealing and lying to those who got pregnant or ran off and lied, to those ones who also tried breaking homes, stealing baby food, influencing kids negatively, maltreatment of kids kept under their watch and more... I just read a story of a woman who adopted her niece, took her with her family to the U.K only for niece to turn around and claimed she was brought abroad the nurse and mind the woman's kids and she has been suffering maltreatment since she got to the U.K and just like that, this woman had her kids taken away. She was pregnant at the time of the accident, few months in...

'Mummy, Mummy, I want to be a soldier! D exclaimed in high pitch, with all forms of joy radiating all over him. Ha! Soldier? He chose to be a soldier for his school career day. When did that kind of rough play start? Yes, hubby and I decided not to interfer in the kids choice of career but this one? Na, it's definitely nothing but a suicide mission in Nigeria to become a soldier. A friend's husband, a military personnel,was kidnapped in the N.D.A (Nigerian Defense Academy) and a Ransome of 200million was demanded by the bandits before he'd be released, My neighbour's son was killed as well by bandits. Pletorial of cases and videos exist, showing our soldiers suffering undue hardships, kidnapped, killed, maimed and more. All these fora countries where the leaders don't blink even as people die on a diaily, the armed forces are not armed! They get next to nothing for all their services and sacrifices and then, we don't equip them,  so basically, th...

'How do I look?' I asked Hahaha hahaha hahaha 'Where this one dey go? You sure say you don ready? Who you won even go see? For your mind, you don baf up'. My brothers all kept throwing jabs at me. The things I've suffered! My name is Adanne, a typical Igbo name given to first daughters. Well, in my case, I happen not to be the first daughter, but the only girl amongst 5 boys. Whenever I mention this, people tell me I must be pampered silly and enjoying all the attention at home. Hmmmm I used to be happy, growing up to the fact that I was the only girl. I also assumed I'd be spoilt to infinity. Well my brothers showed they came from a different stock.  They'd taunt me at any given opportunity, throw jabs, and drag me over tiny things. Well, yes these guys are the most naughty but they've showered me with so much love, care and protection for which I'd always stay grateful. As a lady how do you cope with your brothers? And brothers why so j...

'Bring my grand-child here' She bellowed 'This would definitely stop the hiccuping and blablabla'  I tuned off. After loads of argument I was officially tired. How does a white thread of material on the head translate to cure for anything? There are so many myths surrounding pregnancy, childbirth and nursing a baby. The passion with which our Mamas believe this is second to none. I've heard of many pregnant women who claimed putting in pin their clothes does this and that.   That's how a lady screamed and ran to me one time when I was pregnant, telling me not to jump across a gutter. According to her I was meant to climb the slab placed over the gutters else....  Well, it's funny to watch our parents and how high they hold these myths but in the end, all that matters is that we are all healthy right?

These people going to library everyday with big big textbooks what is it sef? What's the special thing they're doing that somebody cannot do? Every small thing you'll see Funmi entering the library. The worst part is that most times I'd be coming out of the restaurant when we're crossing paths. Even Elizabeth will be carrying her nose up while looking down at somebody with those her thick glasses. And they'd be walking as though they have a secret passcode to first class that others will never know. I met Funmi again this afternoon just when I was about entering my favourite eatery. That's how this anger welled up inside me. I ate my food as quickly as I could, rushed to the hostel I lifted my biggest textbook and bounced into the library. Today all them efikos will see that they do not have monopoly of knowledge. Four hours later, my eyes had turned red. Hmmmmmmm, I stretched my legs and faced the task at hand. I looked at my watch after what se...

Eheeeeeennnnnn We know AuntyB na, this has always been her format But today, God in his mighty awesomeness decided to expose her evil ways. Mum wasn't much of a kitchen person when we had our cousins and Aunties living with us  She supervised occasionally and let us do our thing. Which meant we were served meals by eldest person at home. Well at this point, AuntyB happened to be the eldest. AuntyB's regime was a very trying time for us. We were served according to her moods and sorry would be your name if you were in her bad book. She was a specialist in giving us a pinch of meat while she ate and ate to her heart's content. So we always prayed like the Israelites, to be delivered from her captivity. Well, this glorious day, she was all business as usual and our hearts were embittered because Mum brought home very tasty and crunchy chicken and we got next to nothing. After dishing her meal, AuntyB decided to join Mum in the sitting room to watch tv. During the c...

Four years relationship and he walks in on her making out with another person. Three years relationship and she stumbles on a Facebook post of him getting married. How about those who have spent years with a person, only to discover their partner is married with kids? Ohhhhh should we talk about those who sponsored their partners through school, only to be dumped upon graduation. Same applies to those whose spouse picked up and set up and they turned around when they felt they had arrived. How about being together for years, abortions and all, then when he wanted to get married he remembered you weren't his tribe, you were dark skinned, you weren't a virgin... Hmmmmmmm relationship is a dicey affair. It may not begin and end the way one planned but there's an underlying factor that is universal no matter what and that is 'Empathy'. The way you treated that person before you left, the way you ended that relationship, or the way you used that guy or lady, ...

Please who wants to rent children? Right now I'm looking for the best and quickest possible place to hide from my kids. Hubby has always been the most loved and sought after. Once Daddy gets home, I become forgotten by the kids. Imagine that! Children I carried for 9 months, breast-fed and lost my shape for. This children will not even look at me twice oh It's all Daddy this, Daddy that, Daddy, Daddy, Daddy... I had resigned to fate that I was the unloved. Then hubby traveled. This has been the longest he has been away from the family. My people, that's how love has transferred oh. The kids literally follow me EVERYWHERE now, rain or shine, hot or cold, showering or peeing, eating or sleeping, wherever, whenever. Right now? I don't want love again oh Dearest Darling hubby, please come back home and take your children. I no do again!

I heard ladies rent wigs now for outings.  Hmmmmmmm I didn't believe until I went to my tailor today and met worse. This fine Sisi came to borrow somebody's dress from the tailor for her birthday shoot. While at it she was complaining to her friend about calling someone to beg for money to celebrate her birthday but haven't gotten any response yet. Her friend asked her if she had finally paid her rent. Well, it was a capital NO, but she was all about gathering her meager resources and going out of her way in order to celebrate her birthday. I wonder how people set themselves up for nothing or better still, standards and lifestyles that are way above their level. Why not grow at your own pace? Why not be satisfied with what you have right now, but work your way to a better life? Why cut corners? Or do crazy things just for show? Things that don't actually define you or increased your worth. Things that don't matter in the end. Doing things in your due tim...

Word on the street is that wisdom is spreading everywhere like wildfire! Financial wisdom at that. Men are wising up to the latest money strategy, cash flowing, boys balling, guys spending, men buying. And the ladies? Flaunting and parading. Battle of who Sabi pepper pass at absolutely no cost they all think without knowing there's a price to pay for everything. So hubby and I went on one of our weekly date, while at it, a group of about 5 young men walked into the lounge and sat close to us. Ordered and ordered until their table was full, and they kept hailing and praising each other. And then began to spill tea. They began talking about how they've been borrowing funds from loan apps without stress, unlike our local banks.  So the new world out there is people  taking loans from loan apps without paying back. And those who decide to pay, take from other apps. All these without intention to pay and they believe they're pretty clever and won't be caught. Wel...

Today was a very hot day in church because it was Mummy Kira's dedication. Everyone in church already knew it was going to be a happening Sunday because her hubby is a very wealthy man who deals big time in the importation business so, money wasn't a problem. Secondly, they finally had a baby boy after two girls. Her husband has been so overjoyed since the birth of his son and spared nothing in preparation for today. Here we were in church after so much dancing, it was time for the entertainment. Hmmmmmmm my people, it looked like someone pressed the madness activation button. Chai! It begain like a joke until they were almost practically exchanging punch and trading words. With each other. So these girls that I've been looking at as clean and posh, admiring from head to toe were right in front of me, dragging food and souvenirs, even collecting multiple times. Hmmmmmmm. Well, you never know who's watching oh my people. Aunties forgot manners for a plate of ...

Remember the pic above? That was the good old days. Anyone who had one of it was a big boy/girl. And for someone who's first love is music, Dad didn't hesitate to get me one. Back in the days we were always tuned to the radio. Knew all the timing of programs, Had our best programs where we couldn't wait for our favourite songs to be played. And we'd sway and dance. Then we progressed to having tapes. Some radios had provision for tape, such that whenever one's favourite song came on air, you'd run and start recording it in your tape to be replayed later. That's how we got our own playlist of today. Chai! The good old days.

Ohhhhhh, it surely was over for me oh. Mum sent me to go and buy things from the market. She even gave me list so I won't forget anything and then told me to hurry. Chai! If only I knew of the devil's plans, I would've resisted Chidinma when she called me over. I saw that Chidinma was playing rubber ring when I went over. Their compound was in the street next to ours, with a dwarf fence. That's how I saw her playing rubber. Everyone in the area knew me as the rubber Queen. And this time, there was a beautiful rubber doll to be won.  High stake indeed! That was how Chioma forgot what her Darling mother sent her and was blazing trail. I dusted everybody and won. The real plan was to spend like 5-10 minutes and conclude the game with a win. Well, that's how I ended up spending over and hour and when I was ready to leave, I couldn't find the cash and list mum sent me with. Heyyyyyyyyyyyy God, I could only imagine how this situation was going to be for me...

Proverbs 15:1-2 1  A soft answer turns away wrath, But a harsh word stirs up anger. 2  The tongue of the wise uses knowledge rightly, But the mouth of fools pours forth foolishness. All you need sometimes is just a gentle response or a gentle approach to avert or calm down emotional explosion.  Any person who knows this definitely has mastered the key into people's lives. A soft answer is like a fire extinguisher that brings every fire to a calming halt. It has the potential to mend and heal relationships. Sometimes all you need, is to do your corrections, discussions, suggestions and more in love. No matter how beautiful you are, the content of your character, far outweighs beauty. And the softness of one's responses can make family grow closer and stronger and forgiving. As little as the mouth is, it's a power house as everything that proceeds out of it can make or mar. Be that soft voice of reason.

In our today's society, everyone needs protection  Everyone needs to be guarded against the wind of depression Against the cancer called bad news all over social media Against the wind of jealousy, evil and death Against back stabbers, gossips and ill wishers. Everybody deserves the opportunity to be loved, cared for, pampered and cherished Everyone deserves to taste goodness. So many challenges  So many reasons to faint  So many ills in the air We all need a shoulder to lean on That person to cry to in our moments of weakness. Do not be quick to pick a fight To reply with words that might hurt To act out Be quick to give love, joy and peace  Be a channel of love So, enough with the negatives Enough of the evil vibes Enough of anything that would try to break you. ENOUGH!!!

I can only imagine Oh, I can only imagine The pain The tears The questions, why, how? The disbelief  The blame The trauma of loosing a loved one? Worst, the trauma of loosing a child so dearly beloved, one you just celebrated. No one deserves to know such pain No one The loss of a child you've nursed and loved. A million and one persons have the perfect reasons, ideas and advice or better still, suggestions on how the parents should parent Do's and Don't Counsellors with infinite experience. And those throwing blames on the mother or father? Shhhhhhhhhh and comeback after nursing yours. With so many persons in the house, how could a child have found his way outside and drowned in the pool with no one noticing? We never can tell. As a parent, this can bring nothing but tears of sorrow to your eyes. All we can do now is offer prayers and words of comfort to Davido and Chioma for the traumatic loss and also for every parent put there who have lost their child. God ...